how (not) to be the perfect lover

step 0.1 fall in love with a girl and not be able to get over her

yeah. . .

dont judge me maggie already does it enough.

anyways spoiler alert me and her broke up several months ago and im still not over her and i dont think shes over me yet. spoiler alert me and her are currently in a weird situation and i will simplify it as friends with benifits but im totally still in love with her hahaaa. . .

anyways hope you enjoy reading this

Step 1. Fall in love at first sight 

For me it was at a skatepark I randomly decided to ask my dad to take me late one night and when we got there she was there. She was skating around she wasn't the best at it, but she was better than me and by a lot. I'm not sure what it was about her but I knew I wanted her. I don't exactly remember how, but we ended up sitting down together and talking for a while about our interests. I don't know what happened but I fell in love with her. Luckily for me, my cousin noticed how interested I was so he asked for her Instagram and gave it to me. After talking to her for about an hr my dad decided it was time to go home. That night I texted my friends about how I saw a really pretty person at the park.

I knew I had to see her again but I didn't know how I would. luckily she had mentioned that she went to the skatepark every day, so I went back over and over again just to see her. eventually, I made some excuse so that we could sit on the swings and just talk. we stayed there and talked all day. after talking to her for several days and looking for a reason to text her I finally found one "there's a man with no feets on the bus." I know that's probably not the best first text but whatever I was desperate.

step 2. confession of interest

after about a week we both knew we liked each other but were both too scared to say it eventually we both confessed and I left it there.

step 3. oh shit I should probably ask her on a date

Her best friend texted me a few days after I confessed to her that I liked her, and I forgot exactly what it was but it was something like "aren't you gonna ask her on a date."

and my response to that was "holy shit I totally forgot people do that."

step 4. ask her to be your partner, to be honest, I completely forgot what I said but I remember it was along the lines of

"(British hand gesture thing) will you be my partner" well something along those lines I'm totally wrong tho.

she said yes for some reason. I would totally say no if I was her.

step 5. plan dates that never happened

she was completely shocked about how many movies I hadn't seen and how many places I hadn't eaten at.

we planned to watch Coraline and hamilton together.

and to eat at p. Terrys together sometime.

we never watched Coraline, and I only got about an hour into hamilton before falling asleep on her.

step 6. go on your first date (kinda)

my cousin asked me to go downtown with him, so I invited her and one of our friends naturally.

when we met up with them she had on pants with holes in them and in the holes, there were drawings all over her legs, and her hair was curled. to this day I haven't seen anyone prettier than she was on that day.

we walked around and found a cool parking garage we went up and just messed around for a while.

she sat on the edge and I hugged her the whole time because I was worried she would fall.

I just wanted a reason to hug her. there was a p Terrys across the street from the parking garage so we went there to eat. That's one thing crossed off the date list. it was an amazing time and I still smile when I think of that time.

step 7. go on your second date alone this time

I lied we went to the same place with the same people. it was really nice. tbh I don't remember if this was the first day or second but she ended up in my hoodie and seeing her in it made me so happy. we also held hands and that made me th happiest I had been in a decent while.

step 8. extras that dont deserve their own entry

Me and Her were both in mental states. horrible mental states and what's about to happen affected hers a shit ton in the wrong direction. we were also both in our first real "serious" relationships

OH YEA she also set a woodchip on fire and then before regestering it would still be hot even after she blew on it she decided to put it on my arm. i still have the scar and it was so funny.

step 9. "I Love Her"

I think at this point we had been dating for only like 20 days but i wanted to say it, so I wrote a letter for her and ended up showing her, but I blurred it out and you couldn't tell what it said.

she basically begged me to tell her what it said and after messing around for a while I finally said it

"it said I love her" I think her response was "I love him"

step 10. first kiss

let me be clear with you i was terrified of kissing her the last person i had dated before she said i sucked at kissing and I didn't was so scared she would also think i sucked.but one day after pushing her into a creek- actually lemme clarify.

we were messing around over a creek and i kept pushing her towards it but holding her enough so she wouldn't fall. . . at least i thought i was. she ended up falling in and pulling me in with her. we walked to a bench and sat down and just messed around both of us soaking wet. as our faces got closer we got quieter until we were basically centimeters away and we sat there for an embarrassing amount of time, but we kissed. we had our first kiss and it was amazing.

step 11. "I Love You"

i finally got the courage to say it so i told her "I love you" and she said it back

step 12

we were hanging out when she got a call to go back home. I waited for her at the park and when i saw her i somehow knew what had happened before she even had to tell me. her dad had died.